Sometimes, i don't feel like i want to talk. OR speak my mind.
I rather keep it..secretly in my "plaster" heart. - abaikan my serabai English. As i'm trying to improve my not-good-a-bit English.
This morning..as i sit in Library with my lovely roomate, my senpai...listening to Adele album (21)...i read. I read my usual-visit-blog : Iluvislam.com...then..messing around with Pakcik Google. I found one blog. One of the wut-ever girls i ever met. Yes, i admit they are..really gorgeous & stylish..
but..let's think a bit..Why they can be like that?
1. Because their descendant is RICH. They have MONEY. TONS of it. and do they mentioned buy their stuff at boutique such as ZARA when there is SALE? just one word..DANG. You guys think after SALE kat butik cam ZARA tu..korang dapat beli long skirt dengan harga rm15? Nonsense la this one. HUH.
2. Their family is sporting enough.
3. Let them be.
I dont know why i felt annoyed reading their pages..like..wut the hell they are doing? how come they got so much money for that? They working their a** off so much? OverTime?...Crap!!
It's a bad thing to "buruk sangka" on these type of girls..but common girls..
when you are so damn happy chilling out with ur friends like that..shopping while "SALE" la kan..
why dont u donate ur cheap-money to us? For us to survive our life here? haha.
That is one thing i learnt this morning. Yeah..people can be so mean sometimes, can be very sensitive too, can be over-excited, can be annoying, can be..anything they want.
As for me. i choose neutral. I afraid to laugh and be happy too much..cause i scare in the next day, i'm "paying" for it (doing all the opposite things from yesterday) T_T
Move on to another thing...there is one problem. I think i am in the "Inception" world now. I mean it.. I'm a day-dreamer. While i walking-my-lazy-legs around the campus...i think i saw someone. i saw him. Oke..maybe it is IMPOSSIBLE ...but i did stop..and staring at him. LONG enough..
I wait till he turn to face me...and..there he is. He is the anonymous...haha. and..definitely different from him. haha..a bit old. but from behind..he did make me stop to stare at him. haha. stoooooopido me!
Did i miss him? I don't know. Maybe a part of me..still don't believe the truth..that he already move on..without me. He let me falling behind. Thinking & writing about this..already hurts my heart. (apatah lagi..nak senyum kan..)...Not long after that incident..i realise..i did walk...leave my minds behind..sampai terlepas LIBRARY...ouh..oke..that clumsy me. haha. Me is kuat berangan. and JUMPS between my dreams. Before tido, i always think what " i am" in another 5 years. Where i'm gonna be? With who? ermp...let Allah decide it.
The last thing i want to blabber this tuesday day is...
i'm getting sick watching people.
Can i?
My heart barely feel anything anymore.
I dont feel like doing anything.
I just wish..i can go back...be with my family..or go anywhere...being a backpackers (hey those GIRLS above, donate some money for me to travel to Japan INSTEAD. DANG!!)
haha...apa lah yang dimerepekkan hari-hari selasa ni.
It's just my inside conscious mind that talking. My physical? Isn't working today. haha.
As for my song today: Set Fire to The Rain by Adele :)
- beautiful lyrics. I love her -
I let it fall, my heart,
And as it fell, you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me
My hands, they're strong
But my knees were far too weak
To stand in your arms
Without falling to your feet
But there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.
[Chorus:]
But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!
When I lay with you
I could stay there
Close my eyes
Feel you're here forever
You and me together
Nothing gets better
'Cause there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew,
All the things you'd say,
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.
[Chorus:]
But I set fire to the rain,
Watched it pour as I touched your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, it felt something died
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time!
Sometimes I wake up by the door,
That heart you caught, must be waiting for you
Even now when we're already over
I can't help myself from looking for you.
[Chorus:]
I set fire to the rain,
Watch it pour as I touch your face,
Well, it burned while I cried
'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name
I set fire to the rain,
And I threw us into the flames
Well, it felt something died
'Cause I knew that that was the last time
The last time, oh, oh!
Let it burn
Let it burn
Let it burn
P/s: Kita BAKAU je!!! haha.
No.120
